TIMETABLE
During the 3rd grade year
You will receive an email in November when your child enters 3rd grade prompting you to complete the B’nei Mitzvah Planning Form and a date will be assigned to your child in February/March.
During the 6th grade year, regardless of B’nei Mitzvah date:
B’nei Mitzvah Orientation- September of the 6th Grade year
Join the Jewish Conversation sessions on Sunday mornings:
- During these sessions, we discuss topics ranging from Jewish Identity, your child’s Mitzvah Project, and Israel and the Jewish people. These are required sessions for parents and students
- Your child will receive their Tefillin on Worldwide Wrap Day
- If your child participates in Chai385, there are two Shabbat morning services
12 Months Before the Simcha:
Your child will begin private instruction with one of our tutors: Cantor Elias Rosemberg, Hazzan Sheini Dan Nesson, Ruth Tepper, or Jon Tatelman.
Begin attending Sunday morning minyanim, Friday evening Shabbat services, and Saturday morning Shabbat services. Your child is required to attend 5 Friday evening Shabbat Services and 8 Saturday morning Shabbat services in the year prior to their B’nei Mitzvah.
1-3 Months Before the Simcha:
Your child will begin working on their D’var (speech) with Rabbi Robinson, Rabbi Gardenswartz, or Rav Hazzan Berger.
We will schedule your meeting with the clergy, final rehearsal, and photo scheduling.
Rita Cohen, Project Manager, will reach out to you to discuss sponsorship options for the kiddush and flowers.
1 Month Before the Simcha:
Submit the appropriate Honors Planning form (Shabbat Morning or Shabbat Mincha) and the B’nei Mitzvah Questionnaire
Let AJ know if you plan to attend the Monday or the Thursday minyan before your child’s B’nei Mitzvah so your child can receive their minyan card
1 Week Before the Simcha:
Your family will meet with the clergy and have a final rehearsal in the Sanctuary the Wednesday before your child’s date.
Your child will attend Monday or Thursday minyan and receive their minyan card.
Frequently Asked Questions
How old does my child need to be to have their B’nei Mitzvah?
At Temple Emanuel, we encourage all students regardless of gender to celebrate their B’nei Mitzvah at 13 years and a day. Occasionally, parents will ask for a Bat Mitzvah for their daughter at 12 years and a day. While we will of course work with all families to find a date that works best for them and their child, we find that B’nei Mitzvah are best after our teens turn 13. The extra year of maturity makes a difference in our teens’ ability to deeply appreciate the meaning and significance of the beginning of Jewish adulthood.
Can I request a specific parsha or date?
Yes! When you complete the B’nei Mitzvah Planning Form during your child’s 3rd grade year, please give us at least three optional dates ranked from first to last choice on the form. We will do our best to accommodate your preferences. Please note that weekday B’nei Mitzvah or Mincha B’nei Mitzvah happen on a case-by-case basis depending on the needs of your child and family.
Can I request a solo date?
Yes, you can let us know that your preference is for a solo B’nei Mitzvah date, but due to the size of our congregation, we can’t guarantee single dates. In the case of a shared date, the tutors will work with each child individually to chant the maftir and Haftarah, as well as any Shacharit the children may wish to lead. Our rabbis will then work with each child separately to develop their D’var, or speech, and ensure that topics don’t overlap. Children with shared dates have the same responsibilities and receive the same number of Aliyot and honors for their families as children with solo dates.
Can I request a specific tutor or rabbi?
You can let us know your preference, but please note that we may not be able to accommodate your request based on scheduling. Our tutors work with your child on their chanting of the maftir and haftarah, as well as any Shacharit your child may wish to lead. Our rabbis work with your child to develop their D’var.
What do sponsorships and private celebrations entail?
Families can choose to sponsor our community kiddush, bimah flowers, or both. Rita Cohen, Project Manager, will reach out to you 3 months before your child’s B’nei Mitzvah to coordinate sponsorship details and enhancement options.
If you are interested in hosting a private celebration of any kind, please contact Naama Hartz, Events and Floor Specialist, as soon as you receive your child’s B’nei Mitzvah date.
What does the week of the B’nei Mitzvah look like?
The Monday or Thursday prior to your child’s B’nei Mitzvah, you and your child will attend morning minyan at 7:00am for your child to receive their minyan card.
The Wednesday prior to your child’s B’nei Mitzvah, you and your child will meet with the clergy and have your B’nei Mitzvah rehearsal to walk through the order of service and your responsibilities. Your child will have an opportunity to practice their D’var as well as chanting from the Torah. Photo sessions are scheduled before or after the clergy meeting and rehearsal with AJ. This is also a good time to drop off any kippot or items for a private party.
The Friday evening before your child’s B’nei Mitzvah, your child and your family are welcome to attend our Shabbat Alive service, where your child can lead Kiddush if they desire. However, we recognize that many families have dinners or other private celebrations the evening before, and therefore attendance at Shabbat Alive the evening before is not required.
The Saturday morning of your child’s B’nei Mitzvah, you will arrive prior to the beginning of services to have a small ceremony with the clergy, during which your child will receive their tallit.
What do family members do during the service?
Each family receives three Aliyot (being called up to the Torah) and two honors (such as opening/closing the ark, lifting/dressing the Torah, or the Prayer for the Country). Family members receiving Aliyot must be Jewish adults who are at least 12 or 13. Non-Jewish family members are welcome to receive an honor such as opening or closing the ark and the Prayer for the Country.
Who do I go to?
AJ Helman, Ritual Coordinator, will be your primary point of contact. AJ handles date assignments and assists in the assigning of tutors and rabbis.
Hazzan Elias Rosemberg, Director of the B’nei Mitzvah program, will be your secondary point of contact. Hazzan Elias assigns all tutors and assists in date selection.
Rita Cohen, Project Manager, will be your point of contact for sponsoring the kiddush and/or bimah flowers, as well as any kiddush enhancements.
Naama Hartz, Events and Floor Specialist, will be your point of contact for any private celebrations.